02 September 2010
Ms Vivian Tan
HR Executive
Credit Management Consultancy Group
16 Jalan Kilang Timor
#07-05 Redhill Forum
Singapore 159308
RE: Job Application for Financial Analyst Position
Dear Ms Tan,
I am interested in the Financial Analyst position as posted on the redad.com website. When I graduate in 2013 with a Bachelor of Science (Statistics), I would like to join your company as a Financial Analyst.
Being a Financial Analyst requires the mental capacity to analyse large amounts of data, and handle the pressure of a fast-paced job environment. I have the skills and abilities required for this position. There will always be a need for individual work and the team effort, and I am able to be efficient in both aspects. As a pacer for my JC's dragonboat team previously, I had to remain calm during races to ensure that the frequency of the strokes were optimal for the benefit of the team. I am impressed by your company's tremendous track record, and I would like to be a part of your team.
Please refer to my enclosed resume for more information. I believe that there is a lot that I can offer to your company, and I would like to have the opportunity to meet up with you in person to discuss my qualifications and skills. You can email me at junxiong.chan@gmail.com, and I would be glad to provide you with more information on how I can be of service to your company.
Thank you.
Sincerely,
Chan Jun Xiong
Hi Junxiong,
ReplyDeleteI like your application letter as it is clear and concise!Secondly,I like that you were quick to identify the qualities needed for this job and highlight that you possess these qualities in the letter.
However,I would like to point out that you can add on more information about what you can offer to the company besides the skills that you mentioned above.If that can be included,it will be more convincing and I suggest in can be added around the sentence:"I am impressed by your company's tremendous track record, and I would like to be a part of your team." to form a new paragraph.Cheers!
Hello Jun Xiong!
ReplyDeleteWonderful application letter! However, there are two things that I will like to point out.
I feel that you need to justify why the company will still make the right choice choosing you, despite your degree specialisation being different from what the company really wants.
You can also include what the company is famous for, like accountability or risk analysis. This will give the impression that you know a bit about the company and may give you an edge.
Other than the two points (and those mentioned by Melvis), everything looks pretty good! =)
Berwyn
Hi Jun Xiong,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your letter as it is clear and concise. However, there are two things you may work on.
First, you may add more details about your analytical skills. Although they want people with business degree, you do have data analysis skills as a statistician. And I think that is what they are looking for. You can make your letter more convincing by providing more examples, such as your current ST2137 module, what software have you leant for data analysis, etc. Also you can add more details about your communication skills as required by the job description.
Secondly, as Berwyn has pointed out, you can say more about the company to make the letter more specific and to show you have a good understanding of the company.
Hi Jun Xiong!
ReplyDeleteAwesome job in writing up such a neat resume that sums up a lot of important points. I think it will can be further improved by adding a few more points:
1. the job requires a person with a business degree, so perhaps you can mention some examples about your accounting/financial background to spice things up a little more, and perhaps how having a statistics degree differentiates you from the rest?
2. I think it will also be good to say why did you choose to work in the company that you have chosen? It will seem more sincere as it really shows you have done your homework about the company before writing into the company.
3. Perhaps you might want to put in some details or examples of your communications skills in your application letter as the ad specifically mentioned communications skills?
Let's keep on improving!
Hey guys, thanks for your comments. Will work on it according to your feedback.
ReplyDelete